Unable to contribute to Japan's medal count at the ongoing Beijing Olympics, ski jumper Sara Takanashi said she immediately feels like an outsider in her own sport and is questioning whether she should ski on.
"New talents emerge in every Olympics and I feel blessed that I've been able to compete with them. I know there are athletes who weren't able to be here so I'm lucky just to be here," Takanashi said after finishing fourth in the women's normal hill on Saturday night.
"But after coming to terms with my result, I don't understand my role in the sport anymore."
As an Olympic poster girl for Japan, the 25-year-old Takanashi had entered as one of the medal favorites after Marita Kramer, the top-ranked woman in the World Cup standings, was removed from the entry list because of a positive COVID-19 test result.
Takanashi has won a record 61 individual World Cup events, and was looking to improve on her fourth-place finish in the 2014 Sochi Games and bronze-medal finish in the 2018 Pyeongchang Games.
But on Saturday, her third Olympic appearance ended in tears, just off the podium.
Takanashi blamed her lack of effort and explained that fear of letting go of her old self was what got in the way of her finding a level required to better her odds of winning.
When asked if fans can expect her to continue her career and what she imagined the next four years will look like, Takanashi said her mind is still on the here and now, on the slopes of the Zhangjiakou Olympic venue.
"I can't think about that right at this moment," she said.
"I still have a job to do in the mixed team event (on Monday) so I'll put all my energy into preparing for that."
The new mixed team competition expands opportunities for female ski jumpers to compete at the Winter Olympics, and Takanashi is one of nine men and women who could be selected to represent Japan.
The mixed teams are comprised of two male and two female athletes. Only nations who have qualified two ski jumpers of each gender to the individual events can enter the mixed team event.
Related coverage:
Olympics: Sara Takanashi 4th in women's normal hill ski jump
Olympics: Sara Takanashi vows to show golden progress in Beijing
Olympics: Japan to smash medal record but Yuzuru Hanyu may miss history
